Factors for Success in Marriage - Understanding

Is misunderstanding tearing you apart?
One major factor in Marriage success is UNDERSTANDING. The couple should endeavor to understand each other in every situation and circumstance.

A little thing can lead to a major misunderstanding and it may put an end to a marriage that had hitherto been on the way of success.

Every couple should  try to understand the likes, dislikes, tastes, desires, preferences, etc of each other so that there will not be any room for misunderstanding to creep into the family.

The story was told of a couple that was celebrating their 50th marriage anniversary and the couple after all the ceremonies of the day with friends and relations settled down to their usual night tea table.

The husband like he had ever done in the past 50 years made the tea and took his own portion of the bread and gave the wife the head part of the bread and as he settled down to eat he heard the wife sobbing, then he asked with concern and care what could have caused the wife such pain as to start sobbing on their anniversary? The wife in answering accused the husband of insensitivity and said at least for all these years she took it upon herself to always eat the head of the bread but not also on a day of her celebrating 50 years in marriage. 

The husband thereafter explained to the wife for all these years he sacrificed the sweetest part of the bread to the wife just because of his love for her but alas his love was misunderstood.

We should as much as possible get to make ourselves clear in all our dealings with our spouse so that there will not be any misunderstanding. 

Never allow any misunderstanding to come between you and your spouse. 

However, should there be any misunderstanding between you as a couple NEVER go to bed with the misunderstanding unsettled. As Christians it helps you to stay in tune with your God and it helps you maintain a good relationship with your spouse.


Factors for Success in Marriage - Love

People fall into love as people say and as they say too marriage can is an eye opener. Marriage is an eye opener indeed so one needs to prepare fully before venturing into it.

One major factor that guarantee success in marriage is LOVE. When there is love in the hearts of the two people going into marriage there is a sure way to predict that the marriage will work. The reason is not far fetched, the Bible says LOVE covers a multitude of sins.

No matter the issues that may come up in a marriage in as much as there is love between the people they can surely overcome. Love we learn bears all things and it endures all things. Therefore if love is present in a family the assurance of overcoming difficult times will be there.

Love keeps the couple together, not allowing anyone to come between them even if there is any issue. Love is the bond that keeps couples together.

If indeed there is true and unconditional love in the family there can never be a divorce, and every misunderstanding will be resolved as soon as there is one. Love is a cord that unites a marriage. 

Without love family life can be awry, boring and the strength to forge ahead will not be there. Without love no marriage will be able to face the storms that will come later in life, for surely there will come a time when storms will arise in the marriage, but if love is abiding in the family the storm will not be noticed by outsiders and it won't shake the foundation of the marriage.

Love is an essential ingredient needed to make a marriage succeed, love will make a big difference in the family with or without money. Even when there is a valid problem in the home love will make it easy to overcome such problem. 

Love in marriage can not be overemphasized. Therefore in all ways possible never allow the flame of love to die in your home.

Real love, unconditional love, uncompromising love is only found in God. Therefore go back to Him if such love is not present in your home.

Factors for Success in Marriage - God as the Foundation

I wonder how many go about the issue of marriage as if it is a child's play. They gamble into it and expectedly fumble along the line. But there is a starting point for every home that will experience the peace that family life is supposed to bring.

The starting point in marriage should be God. Christ as the foundation of every family is a sure foundation as much as the individuals are truly committed to Him. The Bible tells us that no other foundation can we lay except that which has been laid - Christ the Foundation.

If you make Christ as your foundation then no matter the storm of life that may come against your marriage you will definitely overcome. There is the parable of Jesus that says anyone that builds his house on the sand will have it come crumbling down when the storms come against it, so also every home not built on the solid foundation can not experience the perfect peace that God had planned for the family when He instituted marriage.

God is the BIG factor in every marriage and when He is left out of the equation it leaves the marriage in shambles. You need to allow God the full measure that He deserves in your marriage, not a half hearted mention most allude to Him in their marriage. He should take the center stage.

We have seen marriages that didn't last more than few weeks or months, then one wonders if that is the marriage that God talks about when He said: He that finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Something very essential must be missing in the equation that is making marriages break up as  fast as they are solemnized. The missing link is the God factor.

Let everyone that wants to get married and really wants to stay in the marriage not leave God behind in his or her selection process. 

Many young people make their choice based on so many immaterial conditions like: money, beauty, splendor, material possessions, prestige, political status, career, etc. Leaving the most important out of the equation.

It is my candid advise that our young people go back to God to help them see into the future and also be content with God's choice for their lives.


How to Enjoy a Happy Marriage Forever

If one should consider the experiences of many that have been involved in the marriage institution and had to bark out, it may be difficult for one to actually decide to go into marriage. But the fact that some people's experience in marriage has not been a good one shouldn't debar you from venturing into marriage, and that with a good confidence that yours is going to be with a difference.

I am from a Muslim polygamous family with 12 living children from 2 wives and some few wasted on the battle front of polygamy. Ours was a family full of stress, strive, confusion, divisions and all disturbances.

My father was almost always pursuing our mothers all over our village whenever there was a fight between the two wives.

Who gets what advantage in the family boils down to who our father desires to favour. Though most things got round, there was always a desire to have the best in the family from both parties.

With all these in mind I was determined to go into marriage with the mind that my marriage must be with a great difference from my parents. This is where all marriages must start from:

Having the determination to make your marriage work. Indeed there may come ups and downs in the lifetime of a marriage but with this solid commitment in your mind to make it a success you can always scale through any hurdles that may come your way.

Imaging a driver behind the steering wheel of a car who decides to leave the steering sooner than later the car will drift off the road and end up crashing if the driver will not put up effort to correct the car from the drift. So it is with marriage. If you don't decide to always bring back the wheel of the family back to the road of success the end of the marriage may not be far away.

DETERMINATION to scale through in your marriage is the sole determinant of where your marriage will end. If the two of you involved in the marriage are determined to make it work nothing in the world can make the marriage to fail. But if one of you is undecided about the marriage then any little crisis can lead to separation or even divorce.

When you get married it is supposed to be better for you than when you were single, because it is said in one of the holy books that two are better than one, so it should be that your marriage will be sweet for you.

You therefore need to be so determined that under any circumstance you will make your marriage to work.

Happiness therefore is what you decide to have or not to have in your marriage. But it is something you can do, try your best to get it right.

There are factors that guarantee success in marriage and that will be the subject of our next discussion on this site. Factors that will help you get things right with great precision.